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Monthly Archives: April 2011

The Art of Erotic Spanking

Erotic spanking has had a special place in the hearts of many for thousands of years. The first descriptions of erotic flagellation appear around 600 B.C. and erotic spanking as an art in the world of pleasure gained even more prevalence in the Victorian era, where much of the erotic art and pornography of the day featured arousal and stimulation gained from flagellation and spanking. Spanking is most definitely the most common form and most socially acceptable form of BDSM in society today. So, whether it’s your cup of tea to be bent over someone’s knee or whether you sqweel with pleasure at the thought of spanking your partner yourself, here are some fun tips to try:

  • Set the mood. Decide what you want your theme to be or simply spice up the room with some candles, incense or low lighting to create the perfect atmosphere.
  • Choose Your Weapon. Well, kind of. Obviously there shouldn’t be any actual pain (at least nothing that leaves a mark! ;)), but you should decide what kind of tools you want to utilize throughout the day (or night) with your partner. Whether you and your partner decide together is up to you, but there are a number of options to choose from including bare hands, whips, paddles, floggers, and a number of other fun tools.
  • Choose A Spanking Style. Yes, there are spanking styles! You can spank lightly, firmly, in quick succession, long drawn out strikes with sensual massage in between, and anything in between those varieties or in combination. Choose one or try them all!
  • Choose One or More Spanking Positions. There is a wide selection of places to deal out proper punishment 😉 including over the knee, on your knees, tied up in varying juxtapositions, handcuffed to the bed, the door or some other object firmly allocated to the ground, lying on a bed, bent over a couch, and more. Feel free to try what suits you or switch places depending on which ones hold your interest.
  • Communicate. Communication is one of the most, if not the most, important things to keep in mind during any sort of BDSM fun. Be sure to communicate what you want (if you are the spanked) to your spanker 😉 for the night. It is important to be very vocal about what you want otherwise you’re keeping your partner in the dark and may not enjoy the session as much as you could. If they’re doing everything right, remember to use encouraging words every now and again so that they know you’re enjoying yourself. Your partner will definitely appreciate this as they will enjoy giving you pleasure.
  • Have Fun! Relax and have a good time. Trust is really important for something like this and if you’re both beginners, don’t worry about the rules just yet, simply have a good time and take things slow.


Have a blast!

(I know I would!)


The Fake Orgasm Phenomenon

Fake orgasms are defined as the act of pretending to experience an orgasm (usually during sexual acts) without actually experiencing one. It may surprise you to find that almost 50% of women claimed in web surveys to have faked an orgasm at one point or another and 40% of men claimed the same. I suppose the idea of females faking it (’til they’re makin’ it!) is much more accepted and believable, but I was surprised to find that men do it too!

Not that I particularly feel that women fake orgasms all the time because that just seems like too much work, but the articles online are everywhere and they range from tips on “how to fake an orgasm” to what NOT to do and finally to “he’ll know you’re faking an orgasm if..” articles which help men catch women in the act (literally!).  And, by the way, not all the tip articles are aimed at women. Equal parts aim articles at both male and female readers.

Of course, women have been encouraged to fake orgasms since Roman times as a way to appeal to and please men and also keep their attractiveness (apparently not orgasming was considered unattractive?). Men, on the other hand, have neither been encouraged nor discouraged, but several articles online list instructions on how to pull one off.

So, if you’re planning on faking it any time in the near or distant future, here are some tips :

  • Don’t go overboard with your fake orgasm “performance.” Obviously if you’re attempting to win an oscar with your fake splurging, your significant other or whomever you’ve decide to put on a show for will definitely know you’re faking it so keep things low key!
  • Don’t make eye contact. Haha, I love this one! Don’t look the person in the eye if you’re obviously lying. Hello, this one is a given. Some articles even encourage readers to keep their eyes closed the whole time. Talk about awkward.
  • If you’re a guy faking it, trash the condom immediately afterwards. Don’t want to leave any incriminating evidence behind!

Those are really the only credible (and I use that VERY loosely) tips. The following are tips I wouldn’t follow unless you really want to look like a moron or make your partner laugh.

  • Panting & gasping frequently. Seriously? If you’re not already doing this during sex, you have no business sleeping together!!
  • Grabbing sheets and/or pillows. Apparently this is subtle sign language to your partner that your getting ready for the big O, but come on, I don’t know anyone who is THAT theatrical in bed.
  • Moan & talk nonsensically, then trail off. Apparently, this is supposed to express that you are so caught up in the moment that you’re mumbling or something. Personally, this would just weird me out and make me think you have a split personality or delusional issues.
  • Allow muscle spasming…Because all of a sudden, I am really good at muscle isolation and I can do that.

All in all, I really don’t agree with faking it. I find it really dishonest. Although I do understand that sometimes we’re not always into the moment and simply cannot orgasm, I believe that if you simply discuss the matter with your partner rather than lying straight in their face, the issue will be diffused and settled. After all, if you’re partner cannot empathize with you, then why are you together? Trust your partner and trust that they will understand if you are having an off day. And, if anything, if you know you’re REALLY not in the mood, then don’t have sex. When the moment is right, you’ll both be ready to experience pleasure with one another and it will be a non-issue. BUT, if you really feel you should, by all means, fake it til you make it.

What do you think?

Do you think an orgasm should be faked?

Let me know your opinions by commenting below!

UPDATE! COUPON CODE EXTENDED to APRIL 15, 2011!

That’s right! This special has been extended so if you haven’t made an order yet and purchased that cute little vibe you’ve been wanting, you still have a little more time to do so!

Happy Friday!

(Oh, and Happy April Fool’s Day, but no this isn’t a joke 😉