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Monthly Archives: December 2013

Wishing You the A Safe & Naughty New Year’s Eve!

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I just wanted to take a quick moment to wish you a safe and happy new year’s eve!

Although this is, arguably, one of the most eventful, fun and celebratory nights of the year, it can also be one of the most dangerous so I just wanted to say I hope you all have a wonderful time tonight and that you’re safe and happy! Please don’t drink and drive; between DUI’s and death, it’s really not worth it so stay wherever you are, have a good time and enjoy yourself without worry 🙂

See You In 2014! 

Holiday Sale Extended! Get 10% Off + FREE Shipping Now!

5 Naughty New Year’s Resolutions for 2014

3 Naughty Ways to Gift Your Partner Without Buying Anything! 

Quick Weekend Tip to Get Laid More This Winter! 

Browse Our Items on Masturgasm – here.

Browse Our Items on Amazon – here.

♥ xO

3 Naughty Ways to Spend the New Year!

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Being the naughty nerd that I am,  I thought it would be fun to share some less-than-typical ways to ring in the new year!

After all, it’s almost 2014 😉

  1. Complete Your Naughty Resolutions for 2013 Before Midnight! This one is fun, easy and exciting! Basically, if there was anything you wanted to try in 2013 that you never got around to, try it out on NYE before midnight! This could be as simple as trying anal, one of our threesome toys, or even spiritually enlightening tantric sex.
  2. Play Strip Poker with a Twist! So, this one is basically strip poker, but there’s a fun twist! With each hand that you lose, you not only have to lose one article of clothing, but you also have to confess a fantasy of yours! Enjoy the card game with a little champagne and when you’re both in the nude, consider which of your fantasies you’ll try out first!
  3. Ring in the New Year with Sex as the Clock Strikes 12! This can be customized to your own desires and delights, but basically as the clock strikes 12, you enjoy your first romp in 2014! You can do this in an exotic location, with some new sex toys, or try out some new sex positions.

Whatever you decide, have a great time as 2013 is only going to end once!

Holiday Sale Extended! Get 10% Off + FREE Shipping Now!

5 Naughty New Year’s Resolutions for 2014

3 Naughty Ways to Gift Your Partner Without Buying Anything! 

Quick Weekend Tip to Get Laid More This Winter! 

Naughty Holiday Humor

Browse Our Items on Masturgasm – here.

Browse Our Items on Amazon – here.

♥ xO

5 Naughty New Year’s Resolutions for 2014

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What Would New Years Be Without A Fun List of Naughty Resolutions, Amirite?

Because we specialize in all things naughty, I came up with a list of fun new things to try in 2014 that I’d like to try myself or that I think you should try!

  1. Try out Threesome Sex Toys! This is one that I haven’t quite gotten around to, but
  2. Level Up in Anal Toys.
  3. Get In Touch With My Inner Animal.
  4. Finally Try Tantric Sex!
  5. Dedicate More Time to Intimate Erotic Massages.


Holiday Sale Extended! Get 10% Off + FREE Shipping Now!

3 Naughty Ways to Gift Your Partner Without Buying Anything! 

Quick Weekend Tip to Get Laid More This Winter! 

Naughty Holiday Humor

Browse Our Items on Masturgasm – here.

Browse Our Items on Amazon – here.

♥ xO

Holiday Sale Extended! Get 10% Off + FREE Shipping Now!

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Given the popularity of this sale, we’ve decided to keep it on through the 1st of the year so everyone can get good deals on after-holiday gifts for themselves!

Ring in the new year with TONS of naughty fun and all the toys you can carry at an awesome discount!

3 Naughty Ways to Gift Your Partner Without Buying Anything! 

Quick Weekend Tip to Get Laid More This Winter! 

Naughty Holiday Humor

Check Out Our Items on Masturgasm – here.

Check Out Our Items on Amazon – here.

♥ xO

Merry Christmas!

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Merry Christmas from all of us here at Masturgasm!

We hope you’re having a wonderful holiday with lots of delicious food (and hopefully some naughtiness thrown in for good measure)!

3 Naughty Ways to Gift Your Partner Without Buying Anything! 

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Her

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Him

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Anal Lovers 

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Kinky Couples

Quick Weekend Tip to Get Laid More This Winter! 

Naughty Holiday Humor

Check Out Our Items on Masturgasm – here.

Check Out Our Items on Amazon – here.

♥ xO

48 Hours ONLY! Treat Yourself With Our Holiday Sale!

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Happy {Almost} Christmas!

With the holiday season, we wanted to offer some awesome discounts for those of you who want to treat yourself to something a little special (and naughty) this Christmas as a bit of an afterthought, but nonetheless awesome!

So, for the next 48 Hours, Get FREE Shipping AND 10% Off Any Order of $100+!

Merry Christmas 😉 

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Her

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Him

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Anal Lovers 

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Kinky Couples

Quick Weekend Tip to Get Laid More This Winter! 

Naughty Holiday Humor

Check Out Our Items on Masturgasm – here.

Check Out Our Items on Amazon – here.

♥ xO

Naughty Holiday Gift Guide Roundup!

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We hope you’re all having a fantastic weekend so far!

If you have some down time, catch up with our fun naughty gift guides, shopping specials and other fun kink lifestyle tips!

Have A Naughty Weekend 😉

In the Nick of Time – Get Free Standard Shipping Today! 

3 Naughty Ways to Gift Your Partner Without Buying Anything! 

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Her

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Him

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Anal Lovers 

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Kinky Couples

Quick Weekend Tip to Get Laid More This Winter! 

Naughty Holiday Humor

Check Out Our Items on Masturgasm – here.

Check Out Our Items on Amazon – here.

♥ xO

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Her

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Today’s gift guide is all about her! We’ve put together our top picks and customer favorites to give the ladies on your list the best orgasmic experiences with and without a partner.

{ The Realist } – 10.25″ Homeboy Realistic Feel Dildo with Fauxskin – This is, hands down, the best dildo we have in our arsenal! We have other smaller dildos in the fauxskin material that are nice as well, sure, but this one is the cream of the crop! It’s long, just thick enough, and has a pretty sturdy base. Aside from that, it’s made from TSX Toys’ signature fauxskin which feels better than real skin! Actually it feels more like velvet, if anything, and it’s an absolute dream to use! Orgasms galore will be had with this one!

{ The Ultimate O } – Auto Erotica 3-in-1 Vibrator – If the person you’re gifting or you yourself aren’t that big on realism, then this is a fun stylistic vibrator to pick up! It’s got all the bells and whistles you could want in a vibrator because it comes equipped with a clit stimulator, a g-spot curved shaft and a tapered anal plug which allows you to fill all your holes with total pleasure that will leave you utterly spent at the end of it all! It’s designed to be rocked into your body and was made for women by women.

{ Kinky Kate } – Matador SMP Vibe Dildo – This is a delicious stylistic vibrating dildo that has ridges down it’s shaft for ultimate stimulation. It’s a personal favorite of mine because the vibration controls can be controlled with the handy remote and things can be as mild or intense as you like! It’s also fairly long and thick making this the perfect size for anyone!

{ Primal Instinct } – The Wolfman Canine Animal Dildo – For those ladies who like the furrier things in life, this is the perfect dildo! It’s modestly sized with a suction cup so it can be suctioned down to any hard, flat surface and you can go to town for some yiffing good fun! Designed with a wolf penis in mind, but a bit more stylized, this is perfect for furry yiff role playing and other primal fun. We also have the Wolfman Extension, our anatomically correct Horse Penis Dildo, a larger stylized Horse Dick Dildo, an anatomically correct Whale Penis Dildo (quite large), and a modestly sized Dog Penis Dildo, aptly named Clifford.

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Him

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Anal Lovers 

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Kinky Couples

Quick Weekend Tip to Get Laid More This Winter! 

Naughty Holiday Humor

Check Out Our Items on Masturgasm – here.

Check Out Our Items on Amazon – here.

♥ xO

3 Naughty Ways to Gift Your Partner Without Buying Anything!

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Giving someone a naughty gift this holidays doesn’t have to be expensive; in fact, it doesn’t have to cost you a thing!

Even though we often give tangible gifts, there are other ways to show our love and appreciation for those we hold dear and today’s post is offering 3 alternative ways to gift them and you’ll be spending little to no cash!

  1. Offer Up Your Time… For A Naughty Massage! You know, most of the time, you may not want to give your partner a massage. You’re tired, they’re tired, or both and the last thing you want to do is give them a full body rub down. This holiday season is the perfect time for you to finally give them the massage they’ve been wanting and probably needing and the best part is it will cost you very little if anything at all. You can run a bath for them, prep some scented oils in their favorite relaxing fragrance, lay some towels or flannel on the bed or floor, light some candles, play some nice music and make a whole experience out of it. Not only will they surely appreciate your efforts, but you won’t need to go buy a single thing ( except maybe massage oil and/or candles ).
  2. Have A Naughty Bake-A-Thon! One day this holiday season when you’re both at home alone, put on your skimpiest outfit and bake their favorite meal or pastry! Not only will you in a delicious outfit get their heart pumping, but they will definitely enjoy your culinary efforts and the yummy results of all your hard work. Whether you enjoy a little romp before or after dessert is up to you 😉
  3. They’ve Been Very Naughty This Year…Let Them Unwrap You! You can do this by literally wrapping your naked body in thick ribbon and surprising them one evening with you – as a gift! You can offer up new ideas to try in bed or come equipped with toys – whatever you like.

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Him

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Anal Lovers 

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Kinky Couples

Quick Weekend Tip to Get Laid More This Winter! 

Naughty Holiday Humor

Check Out Our Items on Masturgasm – here.

Check Out Our Items on Amazon – here.

♥ xO

In the Nick of Time – Get Free Standard Shipping Today!

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We’re offering Free Standard Shipping on ALL Orders of $100+ Today!

Hurry & Get the Deal & Get Your Items Just In Time for the Holidays!

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Him

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Anal Lovers 

Naughty Gift Guide 2013: For Kinky Couples

Quick Weekend Tip to Get Laid More This Winter! 

Naughty Holiday Humor

Check Out Our Items on Masturgasm – here.

Check Out Our Items on Amazon – here.

♥ xO